I remember showing someone a coaching demo and the reaction was priceless:
“The coach did nothing but ask questions! What’s the point!”
That is the point.
They expected to see something very directive. The coach giving instructions on how to achieve a goal, overcome a block, make a change, etc.
The thing about coaching is, once you realise something for yourself rather than being told to do something, it is way more ‘sticky’.
If you think about school, you were probably told that doing a little bit of study every day would help no end when it came to exams. There is very little argument here that this is true but I know I did not stick to it. I know it is true now and, in hindsight, wish I had taken that on board but I did not have the awareness and perspective at the time to really let it sink in.
Coaching delivers ‘light-bulb moments’. Those moments of clarity where things just make sense. Things that you may have heard a million times but never really took on board. These ‘light-bulb moments’, where something clicks, gives energy, purpose and drive to really make a change, start something new, achieve something you never thought possible.
This can only happen when you have the awareness and perspective on something that was not there before. This is what happens in coaching and a good coach will be able to raise your awareness through questions as well as sharing what they notice and feel. This changes how you view things and allows new learning, growth and those ‘light-bulb moments.
Being directive, telling someone how to do something, is not my job as a coach. I have seen first-hand that you are your own best expert. A way of doing, a way of being, needs to be right for you at a point in time. Taking direction may work short term but if you truly find your own way, something that works for you, that feeling of flow and energy will give you a much better chance of success.
In the short term, direction works. You can see quick results however, chances are that the results will tail off quite quickly. A coaching approach can take a little longer initially but because of this ‘stickiness’, changes take hold and grow roots. Longer term, a deep-rooted change will pay dividends.
Possible.ie work with companies and private clients to create deep rooted change. We offer Executive Coaching for Senior Management, Leaders and High Potential individuals within companies and Life Coaching for private clients.
This short article was written by Paul Smyth, Founder & Coach for Possible.ie. If you are interested in Executive Coaching or Life Coaching, contact Paul: paul@possible.ie